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Big Dreams take Courage

So I did a thing... my anxiety is kicked up, my heart is thumping and after doing the thing I wanted to crawl under a rock and just disappear.

It's a silly thing... I submitted a video for Chip and Johanna Gaines's investment opportunity. If you haven't heard, to promote Chip's new book and give back, Chip is choosing two finalists to invest in. So I saw this and was like "I should totally submit my dream."


10 million takes later, anxiety heightened, depression kicking in, I submitted a far from perfect video and nearly cried while doing it. The initial adrenaline wore off and anyone who deals with super high highs and way down lows knows what I'm talking about. I crashed.... when I say I crashed, I crashed hard. I'm shaking just sitting here writing this.

I'm telling you this because I'm going to share my submission and it's scary. It's scary to put yourself out there and be vulnerable. It sucks to get rejected. Like really really sucks and while I have completely realistic expectations for this contest, it still sucks when you put yourself out there and get told no.

But I had to. I had to open myself up and knock on some doors. Because that's what taking chances and really living is all about. If I sat here and just accepted where I was and pushed my little nagging voice that keeps telling me I have a different calling aside then I would just sit here in a state of inertia... no movement forward, no movement backward...

Maybe that sounds like a good thing to some people... maybe steady as she goes is a great place to be. Just not for me.

So here it is Universe! Here I am putting it out there, taking baby steps and moving forward with a dream and a hope and some crazy idea that I might or might not be able to manifest in the near future.

Just know how hard this is to share... but I've got to get knocking on those doors because for every 100 that go unanswered theres always that 1 that swings wide open and anxiety be damned, I'm gonna knock till my fists bleed trying to find the door that opens for me.

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