It's ok not to say "its going to be ok."
I don't know what it is about us humans and our human nature, we have this irresistible pull to tell people who are going through difficult times that everything is going to be alright. It's like we have to reassure them, or reassure ourselves, or maybe just try and control the universe... I don't know what it is but what I have learned is that I can't always say "It's going to be ok," because the honest truth is, I have no idea if it will be ok or not. I hope it will be ok, I pray it will be ok, but I am not in control and I can't foresee the future... like at all.
Recently my brother went into the hospital. He's 28. And everyone wanted to say "it's going to be ok." But it's not ok. He was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia and while the prognosis is good and his chances of not only surviving but actually being cured are better than good, he most definitely is not ok. No, his battle has just begun. He will spend the next 30 days in the hospital going through Chemotherapy.
We both know chemo is no joke. The side effects alone are enough to make up an antidepressant commercial. So his battle with ALL is just beginning and the treatment is long and it will take a few years to be cured. The crazy thing is, he just came down with this shit. Like out of nowhere. And it came on fast too.
Let me tell you about this kid... Jared is one of the happiest kids I know, he always has been. But he will tell you to knock it off if he doesn't like what your saying. He is strong and when he makes his mind up he goes after what he wants. He joined the Coast Guard (even when I told him to go into the Army and Jake told him to join the Marines), he married this crazy spunky girl that I definitly did NOT approve of but I am more than grateful for her now. Him and his wife had a baby boy who has Prader Willy Syndrome and they have handled it like champs. Colton needs lots of medical attention so Marissa quit her job to stay home with him and has been more than amazing as they have had many medical appointments and challenges to cope with. And after all that he gets hit with this leukemia crap!
Here's what I know... Leukemia is what Jared has, it's not what he is. This will change him, it will challenge him, it will rock his world and in the end he will not be the same person. He will come through this and he will be a changed man. He will get to choose how he handles this and who he is when he comes through it.
I know more than anything that things will not be "ok." I would trade places with him in a second, I would take this pain, this challenge, and I would handle it all myself if I could but I can't. This is his trial to overcome. So while I know that things won't be exactly "ok" I do know that whatever comes of this will test us, shake our faith, and hopefully make us better people in the end. I'm ok with things not being ok, and you should be too.